How do you deal with grief, on and off the job?

November we set in with a time for remembrance. From All Saints Day to All Souls Day, Dia de los Muertos and other similar holidays from different cultures, during this time we commemorate and honor our deceased loved ones worldwide. These holidays highlight the importance of grieving.

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Dealing with grief is not an obvious but necessary process, which still proves to be a difficult topic to discuss in our society. Often we are not sure how to react or what to say and do when seeing or experiencing loss. How do you deal with grief, in and beyond the workplace? In this blog, we explain to you what grief is and how you as individuals and organizations can take a supportive role for grieving individuals.

What is mourning?

Grief is an emotional reaction to the loss of someone or something with great significance, with which you also feel emotionally connected. Often we think of the loss of a person, but grief can take many forms. Consider the loss of a job, a relationship breakup, getting a bad diagnosis about your health, a dream or expectation that cannot be fulfilled or a demotion.

When someone or something important to you falls away, different emotions come up. Common feelings include sadness, anger, denial, guilt, loneliness, confusion and sometimes even relief. These emotional reactions can have a great impact on our bodies and daily functioning. For example, you may feel very tired, suffer from sleep or concentration problems, headaches or stomach upset, ... A grieving process is unique to everyone and there is no set timeline or rules about how someone deals with grief.

Grieving in the workplace

Grief counseling is dealing with and processing the emotions associated with loss. You cannot simply turn this process on and off at your convenience. Because of this, grief has a major impact on an employee's performance and functioning. Both as a colleague and as an organization, you play an important role in supporting this process.

As a colleague and organization, you can have an important role in supporting this process. Here are some tips that can help you cope with grief.

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As a colleague

1. Listen actively and without judgment: Listen to the grieving person without judging or giving advice. Give them space to talk about their feelings and memories.
2. Dare to ask how you can help: Ask if you can help with work-related tasks or offer support with daily responsibilities. This is how you give your colleague space to grieve.
3. Show empathy: Show that you understand the situation. This can be done through small gestures such as a card, a hug, or simply by being there and listening.
4. Respect boundaries: Respect your colleague's boundaries. Some people may not want to talk about their grief at work. Give them the space they need.
5. Grief is a long process: Offer long-term support and regularly ask how they are doing. Even when things seem to be getting better.

As an organization

1. Implement a grief policy: Have a policy in place that supports the well-being of employees in grief. This can be included in the absence policy and may include flexible leave arrangements, counseling or other support measures. By doing so, you will break the taboo surrounding grief, loss and bereavement and provide answers to the questions raised by grief and loss.
2. Training and awareness: Create awareness about grief and educate your managers and staff on how to support grieving colleagues.
3. Flexibility at work: Be flexible for employees in grief, such as by adjusting work hours or allowing them to work from home.
4. Create a supportive culture: Provide an environment that encourages open communication and empathy. This can lay the foundation for mutual understanding and support. Carry these values yourself to create more supportiveness.
5. Offer external support: Point employees to outside sources of support such as therapists, grief groups or other professional help.

You help your employee process a loss by dealing with grief appropriately here and by providing proper support. This gives your employee the space to express his emotions and give them a place. Are you in need of a consultation or are you an organization looking for support in dealing with mourning? BloomUp will gladly help you.